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By Chile Doctor, posted March 12th, 2010, at 7:00 am
It’s clearly the Silly Season in legislatures around the country and ’round the globe. Bad economic times are driving governments to try the strangest methods for reordering society. A cynical person might even go so far as to say it’s only about getting more money into the government coffers. With the state of our current Federal spending, maybe that isn’t so cynical after all.
But I digress. this post is about New York State, which is vying to become the wackiest place in the USA from a public policy perspective. Yes, even with California still out there! And to speed them along on that collision course with craziness, they’re now considering a totally new approach: Banning salt. At least in restaurant food.
Should this measure pass, expect an immediate exodus of high-quality chefs and cooks from the Empire State. After all, cooking is all about “the control of heat, moisture and flavor” in the preparation of comestibles. Salt has always been a key component in flavor. Not to mention it’s a key component of you! We all talk about too much salt in the diet, but too little salt is fatal. (Not that we have to worry about that these days, and certainly not in prepared foods.)
How are they going to do this, exactly? They say it’ll be a $1,000 fine for each occurence. What about adding black pepper or red pepper flakes to food; wouldn’t that constitute a violation? There’s plenty of salt in those! Oh, and if you can find a restaurant that doesn’t use softened water, then you’re better than I am at this game. So: If they use any water from their system, does THAT constitute a violation? And how do you count it? I think you see this is really all about the money; make the individual fine look small, then pile on with untold thousands of violations. It’s a quagmire for sure.
Of paramount concern here is not whether New York will follow this folly to its ultimate, stupid conclusion. (Hey, it’s New York; YOU connect the dots.) Rather, it’s what it might mean in other places. Like, say, Texas, where smart people live. (Like, for instance, me.) Maybe we’ve had enough Yankees move down here that we could actually get such a boneheaded ban forced on us here? Imagine what that would do to the margarita trade! Shoot, you’d have to drink only those smooshed-fruit girlie drinks; the ones with sugar on the rim. But wait! Isn’t refined sugar a systemic poison?
We’re doomed.
Except for this one bright thought: Texas ain’t New York. So when the idjits in Albany get done legislating their nannylaws and y’all can’t get fat, or salt, or sugar or anything to eat up there, y’all just think of us down here, shooting our shots and eating our limes. With salt. It’ll help you through the day, I’m sure; I know they do for me…
Enjoy the (Gormless Grub Laws) Heat!
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Technorati : Follies, New York, dumb laws, salt
By Chile Doctor, posted March 11th, 2010, at 8:00 am
A recent post in Slashfood reminded me I was overdue to visit one of my favorite food websites: The Skinny Chef. This being Lent and all, I’m always looking around for ways to assist those who want their traditional seafood on Friday. However, I’m not that traditional a fella. (I know, it’s a shock; you’ll get over it.) If you look at the Fish 4 Friday archives, though, you’ll find I enjoy making sauces for fish. It’s not the fish that excites me, let me tell you. Coming up with great flavors to pour over the fish, that’s the compelling part for me.
Apparently I’m not the only one.
The Slashfood post mentioned above shows four great sauces you can use with fish dishes. These sauces are all easy to make, delicious in their own right, and they don’t hide the flavor of your trout or flounder. Kids will even like them with their fish sticks! (Well, okay; maybe, maybe not. But you can try!) Rather than repeat the recipes here, I’d invite you to go to Slashfood and get them. Better yet, stop by The Skinny Chef and look at Even More Recipes. They’re all tasty, I’m sure!
Heck, you might not even notice they’re not fattening…
Enjoy the (Fish Flavor -Boosting Sauces) Heat!
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Technorati : Fish 4 Friday, Lent, Skinny Chef, Slashfood, salsa, sauce, seafood
By Chile Doctor, posted March 9th, 2010, at 7:55 am
I know, it’s all the fashionable, natural thing to do these days. I’m talking about serving up the perfect meal: Breast feeding your infant. A recent report on FoxNews.com, though, starkly shows the dark side of this trend. The article states that Toni Tramel, a 31-year-old female (I won’t say lady until there’s more evidence) was being held on $10,000 bond for assaulting a police officer during a drunken confrontation. (No, the cop wasn’t drunk.) The deadly weapon used by this evil perpetrator?
Breast milk.
Yep, you read that right. After being arrested, Toni was changing into an inmate’s uniform at the jail when she suddenly, and without provocation, attacked the female deputy who was overseeing the change of clothing. She sprayed a deadly stream of lactose-and-alcohol infused liquid into the poor cop’s face! Isn’t that how World War One got started? Anyways, Toni’s misdemeanor public drunkeness charge was immediately upgraded to felony assaut. Hence the big bail.
I have no pictures of Ms. Tramel, so I can’t comment on the size of her, er, weapons caches. I do remember when PJ was breast feeding that you had to be out of range, and well off-angle, whenever Jessica cried, or you could lose an eye from the reflexive letdown. Maybe Toni had no options left; she was unlikely to get close enough to smother the policewoman with her bazookas. A full frontal attack with jets of juice may have been her recourse. No word on whether the public servant suffered any lasting damage.
Naturally, the social discourse on this most heinous attack will now move on to the consideration of lacteal liquids as bioweapons. How will our vaunted TSA deal with this new threat to travel, for instance? No infants onboard, and only allowed as checked luggage? Hand searches to be sure that the potential terrorists really only have silicone accessories, and not natural portable potables? If you thought the security lines were slow these days, just wait until the next wave of restrictions hits our nation’s airports! That will have to be the toughest job in security.
Where do I sign up?
Enjoy the (Lactose-Intolerant) Heat!
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Technorati : Follies, assault, breast feeding, drunkeness, milk
By Chile Doctor, posted March 5th, 2010, at 7:00 am
The Italian government is seeking to win the stupid legislature sweepstakes, it appears. They recently passed a law making it illegal to practice molecular gastronomy, according to a recent post in Slashfood.
The law bans certain types of ingredients commonly used in molecular gastronomy. Oh, you don’t know what molecular gastronomy is? Well, it’s an emerging fashion trend in cooking, and it makes use of special additives (called powders), as well as unusual materials like liquid nitrogen. Anyway, the additives are usually concocted from common food additives and other materials, and they’ve proved harmless so far. That’s not good enough for Italy, apparently! So restaurants in the Roman State are going to have to find other food fashions to explore.
This law is a portion of an attempt to eliminate liquid nitrogen from Italy. Yes, you read that right. No liquid nitrogen! This cold (and otherwise inert) material is second only to fire as a material necessary for the operation of modern technology globally. Italy apparently wants to return to their Golden Age, somewhere back around the time the Colosseum was under construction. The next law they’re considering in this field involves banning the “storage, transportation and use of any gaseous substance.” Which means they’ll have to all hold their breaths until the law’s repealed. (Good luck with that.)
How can this happen, you ask? Well, there’s a nutjob elected legislator who’s apparently a Greenie, and simultaneously science-phobic. She’s pushing all these weird bills. And given the sheep-like nature of, and general lack of scientific/technical knowledge in, elected politicians everywhere, it’s actually not surprising this went through. It’s so crazy an idea that there is even some talk that it’s all just a publicity stunt.
Public, yes; stunt, hardly. Especially in Italy, where since 1173 it’s been illegal to die in Venice…
Enjoy the (Truly Odd Italian Legal) Heat!
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Technorati : Friday Follies, Italy, molecular gastronomy, stupid laws
By Chile Doctor, posted March 3rd, 2010, at 8:00 am
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has posted a notice that at least 245 people have been infected with the outbreat strain of Salmonella Montevideo. These unfortunate folks are spread about in 44 states and the District of Columbia. The first reported case was on our about July 1, 2009. (2009!!) No deaths are recorded at present.
After a long and tortuous forensics investigation, the CDC has concluded that the people who were exposed with this salmonella strain consumed salami (and perhaps other prepared meats) produced by Daniele International of Pascoag, RI. The apparent vector is the crushed red and black pepper used in the meats, and not the meat itself! The CDC continues its investigation into the supply chain.
I’d never heard of dried pepper being the culprit in such a poisoning, although jalapeño and Serrano peppers have been implicated in other food-borne illness cases. I use a lot of red pepper in my cooking, and naturally this report caught my eye. The CDC notes, however, that none of the offending pepper flakes (or black pepper) was sold directly to consumers. Also, Daniele International appears to be the only food preparer who was directly affected. Naturally, with the investigation ongoing, this may change in the future.
So, why hasn’t this incident gotten the press that other recent poisonings have garnered? Beats me; maybe some Big Salami is putting the kibosh on the reports? Or maybe the news officials don’t see prepared Italian cold cuts to be the same level of threat as lettuce? Who knows…
Enjoy the (All Too Spicy Meats) Heat!
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Technorati : CDC, black pepper, meat, red pepper, salami, salmonella, sausage
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